Erotica or talking dirty can feel like walking through a minefield for a lot of people. It’s an area of sex that makes a lot of people feel silly. Mainly because they’re unsure of how to go about it without sounding ridiculous. Which is why when a partner asks most of us to talk dirty we just freeze. Or if you are like me you cringe and become embarrassed. Question such as; what should I say? what if I say too much? can start to creep up. Taking away from the mood of the
Dirty talk, just like sex itself, is something that needs to be fine tuned to the individual. This means knowing what your partner likes and what they don’t like. It’s important to have trust and to make sure that you and your partner know what you want. Below I’ve listed a few tricks to spice up your dirty talk and leave you feeling sexy instead of scared when put on the spot:
- Openess: A good rule of thumb with dirty talk is to tell your partner what you want to do to/with them before you’re doing it. And then while you’re doing it, tell them what you’re liking about it. Any statement about what you have liked doing with them, or that you are envisioning doing with them, is a great way to ease into a super-vocal sex session.
- Be descriptive: While you’re fooling around, giving your partner real time feedback about what you’re enjoying. This is a great way of encourage them to give you more of that thing, and also gives your sexual play the added edge of becoming more of a multi-sensory experience. So be descriptive. For a lot of people, it’s the details of dirty talk that make it so much of a turn on.
- Use All Of Your Senses: One of the fastest ways to boost the power and erotic, engaging quality of your dirty talk is to start using multi-sensory descriptive words. Most people dirty talk with two of their primary senses: sight and touch (i.e. “You look so hot/You feel so good”).While there’s nothing wrong with sticking to your comfort zone by sticking with these. There’s so much fun to be had by letting your descriptive imagination run wild. A few examples of dirty talk phrases that use multi-sensory descriptions; “I love the sounds you make” or “You sound so sexy when you moan.” But what ever you do make sure you are comfortable with it. After all, it is as much for your enjoyment as much as your partner.